Saturday.
I woke up at 6:30am and decided to feed the little cat right away and then lie down again, as I was really tired. I had gone to bed shortly after midnight, but I was so nervous that I couldn't fall asleep until around 2am. And despite my nervousness, I managed to fall asleep again until 8:30am.
I then got up, enjoyed a nice, warm shower, got ready, and spent the time on the sofa, as we didn't want to leave until around 10am.
Shortly before it was time to go, I put Ivi in my room for five minutes and closed the door behind me so that she wouldn't suddenly dash out while we opened the door to the apartment to carry all the luggage to the car. When we were done, we went back upstairs, took her out of the room, of course, and gave her a long hug goodbye.
I must admit that I was a little tired, but the prospect of arriving in Utrecht around 2:30/3:00pm and then being able to spend the whole day in my hotel room gave me the strength to push through.

I wasn't nervous or anxious at all; I just felt that the possibility of meeting Neil wasn't real.
I was in complete denial, possibly to protect myself or to keep my fears and insecurities under control.
There wasn't much traffic on the highway, and we had been driving for about half an hour when suddenly, out of nowhere, our car started to “stutter” and steadily lost speed. On the highway... with numerous cars traveling at a minimum speed of 120 km/h.
120, 110, 100, 90, 80, 60, 40, 20... and with the last stutter, we were just able to pull into a parking bay on the side of the highway, with an emergency phone just a few steps away.

I will always remember my mother's words... Our car is broken.
I can't even describe how I felt. Numb, hopeless, sad. We looked at each other, and the next thing we did was reach for our handbags and wallets to get out our ADAC customer cards ( The ADAC, officially the Allgemeiner Deutscher Automobil-Club (lit. ‘General German Automobile Club’), is Europe's largest automobile association. The ADAC is the largest Verein (club) in Germany, with around 21 million members. Its headquarters are located in Munich. Its original and most well-known service is roadside assistance.)
I hate talking on the phone, I really panic about it, but I know that my mom has poor hearing and that it was simply not possible for her to make a phone call in that situation. You have no idea how incredibly loud a highway is when you're not driving on it.
So I called the ADAC hotline and had to wait about two minutes until I got a man on the other end of the line, to whom I then explained everything, i.e., what had happened, whether the car was still running (surprisingly, it still started, so apparently there was no engine damage), when it happened, and where exactly we were.

I do have a smart phone, but I'm not particularly interested in it. I use it to take photos or listen to podcasts. So it was really stressful for me to explain to the man exactly where we had ended up. I then realized that we had only managed to travel 40 km. :/
When I told the guy that we were right next to the highway (or actually right on it), he said that we had priority over other broken-down cars that, for example, wouldn't start in a town or were stuck somewhere on a country road. I cautiously asked how long we could expect to wait, and they said between 20 and 30 minutes. If the ADAC was nearby, they would call us back on our cell phone and let us know.
Okay.
The next step was to get out of the car and seek shelter behind the guardrail, wearing our safety vests, of course. And then we waited.

So we stood behind the guardrail at -6 degrees Celsius, and since I'm apparently not the smartest person, I had imagined that I would just get in the car at home and drive straight to Utrecht, and that it would be enough to wear a thin wool jacket over a thin sweater....
It was cold. Freezing cold. And we stood on the side of the highway for 1 ½ hours waiting until a man called to tell us that the ADAC tow truck was on its way. Then we had to wait another half hour.
I was frozen to the bone. At least my mother was smart enough to bring a blanket in the car that I could wrap myself in.

While we were waiting, we talked about what we should do.
If the car starts, then we can continue our journey, right, Anke?
My answer was that we should drive back. My mother was upset because she knew how much the trip meant to me and that I wouldn't get back a large part of the money I had spent.
But I was far too afraid to continue. What would happen if it happened again? What if there was no parking lot nearby? What if the car broke down in Holland? How would we get back? How much would it cost?

The young mechanic took a look at everything, even kneeling down several times to look under the car. I sat next to him while he started and stopped the car and drove it forward and backward. He couldn't find any problems. He speculated that it was either the engine or something else (unfortunately, I can't remember what) that works with the engine and that something was broken.
He then asked us what we wanted to do. Continue driving? Or should he take us back, in which case he would have to call his boss first to clarify the situation.

We are very grateful that the ADAC gave us the go-ahead to take us home, because we only have basic coverage, which would have taken us to the nearest repair shop. But since it was Saturday, they were already closed, so we were taken home. I sat in the back of the tow truck and texted Sarah on my cell phone to tell her what had happened and that I couldn't come. Without hesitation, her response was: I'll pick you up....
O_O
I hadn't expected that at all, and I didn't really know if I could accept it. She told me over and over again that it wasn't a problem, that we would find a way to get to Utrecht and have a great weekend.
I remind you that Sarah was at work. We texted back and forth, re-planned everything, and then agreed that she would go home after work, take a shower, eat something, and then drive to meet me.

The trip would take between two and three hours, and we would probably set off for Utrecht around midnight. We got home at around 3pm, which was when we should have arrived in Utrecht. I lay down to get some sleep, but I couldn't manage more than two hours.
I had also informed Jutta that she shouldn't be alarmed when she arrived at our place in the evening, as we would most likely be sitting on the couch waiting. When she arrived at around 6:30pm, we just talked, and despite all the stress, it was really nice to see my best friend again and give her a hug.
From 11pm onwards, I became quite nervous because I was afraid that something had happened to Sarah. A generalized anxiety disorder often leads to imagining absolutely EVERYTHING in an absolute horror scenario. But 20 minutes later, the doorbell rang and Sarah picked us up. So we went down to the car, stowed the luggage and the walker, and then drove off.
And before we set off, I had checked in at the hotel at noon and written to them that my arrival would be delayed. I also booked a room for Sarah at my expense, because that was the least I could do for her after she had decided to pick us up. And there was no question of her spending the night in the car. No way!

The highway was pretty empty and the weather was good - no snow, no fog, no rain. So we left shortly before midnight and arrived in Utrecht at 4:30 in the morning, where we were greeted by a lot of snow. Despite the long journey, the trip was pleasant because Sarah and I talked constantly, moving from one topic to another. We didn't really have a moment of silence because we got along so well. The last 30-40 minutes of the trip were through Holland, and the closer we got to the Dutch border, the quieter I became.
And then, suddenly, I had a panic attack.
I noticed how I was becoming quieter, how breathing was becoming more and more difficult, how my thoughts were really stumbling and I couldn't form a clear sentence anymore.

Sarah quickly realized how I was feeling and helped me through the panic attack with lots of kind words and breathing exercises. (Did I mention that this young woman is an absolute angel?)
So we arrived at the hotel at 4:30am, parked in the last available parking space, and I checked in.
I asked the young man if Sarah could come to our room with us, as I needed help, and his answer was: “Under the circumstances, that's fine with me.” Then he and security carried our luggage and our walker up the stairs.
We went into the room, put our things down, and decided to skip breakfast and lie down until 8:30am so we could get at least a little sleep. And since we had a large king-size bed, we all fit in it and were able to recharge our batteries a bit before leaving the hotel at 8:30am on our way to the comic convention. :3